Treacherous Crossing | EW.com

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Treacherous CrossingOld TV-series stars never die — they just go to the videotape. In Treacherous Crossing, former Bionic Woman Lindsay Wagner plays...Treacherous CrossingOld TV-series stars never die — they just go to the videotape. In Treacherous Crossing, former Bionic Woman Lindsay Wagner plays...1993-03-05

Old TV-series stars never die — they just go to the videotape. In Treacherous Crossing, former Bionic Woman Lindsay Wagner plays an ex-mental patient who loses her husband on a honeymoon cruise, though everyone around her thinks she has lost just her marbles. This is the kind of quaint made-for-TV mystery that’s resolved only when a semi-name cast member, unseen for the first 80 or so minutes, pops up in the last 10 to deliver an incredible confessional monologue. Wagner convincingly evokes the woman’s increasing paranoia, but the rest of the actors — including ceramic tele-relic Angie Dickinson — seem flown in from Fantasy Island.

Grave Secrets (also made for the tube) is a bland Amityville Horror wannabe starring Patty Duke, from 1989’s Amityville 4: The Evil Escapes. Here, she and David Selby play a couple whose new suburban home is possessed by the souls of dead black people who make the toilets flush by themselves and play around with the garage-door opener. Though oddly sober, Grave Secrets nevertheless spotlights one of those proudly stupid families that practically needs to be beaten even more senseless before it decides to get out. Treacherous Crossing: C Grave Secrets: C-