What is it about New York cop shows? Both Law & Order and NYPD Blue have seen more characters come and go than the desk sergeant at the Times Square precinct house. Now NYPD’s Gail O’Grady, who plays buxom secretary Donna Abandando, has announced she’ll leave at season’s end to star in a Fox sitcom. Will her exit be as flashy as her sequined sweaters? Here are 10 ideas for a snazzy send-off:
1. Realizing that women are merely sex objects in the 15th precinct, Abandando gets a job with Melrose Place’s D&D Advertising, where women rule.
2. A crazed Medavoy (Gordon Clapp) guns down Abandando after discovering her clandestine affair with Lesniak (Justine Miceli).
3. After learning hairstyling from upstairs secretary John Irvin (Bill Brochtrup), she opens her own beauty parlor, Abandan-do’s.
4. Abandando’s ever-jealous sister, Dana (Debra Messing), frames Donna for a string of parking violations and usurps her job. Donna joins ex-detective John Kelly (David Caruso) as a mall security guard in Paramus, N.J.
5. While ice skating with her hockey-playing ex-boyfriend, Abandando dies in a tragic Zamboni accident.
6. Inspired by former DA Laura Kelly (Sherry Stringfield), Abandando moves to Chicago and becomes a surgical sub-intern at a busy hospital.
7. In a tender reunion, Abandando again removes her robe for Medavoy – who promptly has an asthma attack and dies. She joins a nunnery.
8. After Sipowicz (Dennis Franz) beats the crap out of a suspect, Abandando offers to buy him a drink. Their resulting six-day bender leads them to the Betty Ford Clinic.
9. Abandando writes a memoir about life in a detective squad, sells it to Hollywood, and becomes a consultant on a hit TV series, NYPD Blond.
10. In a shocking twist, Abandando reveals she’s a mole for the Internal Affairs Bureau. She turns everyone in, and the show is cancelled.
– Kristen Baldwin and Bret Watson