1. PAMELA AND TOMMY LEE
Their love was like their tattoos — painful, cheap, and only skin-deep.
2. PEE-WEE HERMAN
The kiddie comedian has agreed to star in a new sitcom. It’ll be called Third Row From the Screen.
3. O.J. TRIAL II
For people who flunked Hard Copy last year, it’s remedial tabloid television.
4. LEANN RIMES
The 14-year-old country singer is getting $1.25 million for her book. Those weeks of struggling finally paid off.
5. JOHN CANDY
Canada plans to honor the late comedian with a stamp. Postage or food?
6. THE CRUCIBLE
The story of the evidence-free, accusation-heavy Salem witch trials. It’s where John McLaughlin got his start.
Now it’s being used to treat bulimia. The hard part is keeping it down.
8. THE RULES
The handbook on how to catch a man is still Topic No. 1 around the watercooler. Who’s divorcing whom is Topic No. 2.
9. CHRISTMAS TV SPECIALS
They make you remember the true meaning of the holidays: a 23 rating and a 40 share.
10. AUTOGRAPHABLE CASKETS
Your loved ones can send you off with a touching permanent message. Like ”For a good time, call 555-3904.”
She says someone on her show will come out of the closet this season. So, that’s where they hid the second Becky.
12. 101 DALMATIANS
Cruella De Vil wants a fur coat made out of cute little puppies. That is soooo last season.
13. HOLIDAY SHOPPING
And what will be the hardest thing to get this Christmas season? A salesperson’s attention.
14. BARBARA WALTERS
She’s interviewed ”the 10 Most Fascinating People of 1996.” We can’t wait to hear what Madonna’s baby has to say.
15. OPRAH’S BOOK CLUB
Other talk shows will try the idea. Ricki Lake had one scheduled — but Fabio hadn’t finished reading his book yet.