What the country is talking about this week…
1 HEROIN CHIC The worst thing about it? It’s hard to tell if you’re being mugged by a junkie or a model.
2 MI5 The British secret service is advertising for agents. Do you have to know how to golf, ski, and gamble — or do they teach you?
3 THE TONYS The biggest award you can get on Broadway. It’s almost as good as being cast in a movie.
4 FLAMING POP-TARTS A New Jersey couple claim a fiery breakfast treat burned down their house. They couldn’t put it out with some Tang?
5 TOM BROKAW CNN reportedly offered him $7 million to leave NBC. It’ll cost another $3 million to scrape Bernard Shaw off the ceiling.
6 TRIAL AND ERROR Seinfeld’s Michael Richards pretends to be a lawyer. But he gives himself away by doing something unselfish.
7 LITTLE LEAGUE A girl was removed as catcher for not wearing a cup. But a woman’s brain is protected by her helmet.
8 PORT CHARLES A soap opera spun off from General Hospital. GH’s HMO won’t cover plots that stay longer than 24 hours.
9 MARV ALBERT Remember, he’s innocent until he’s been dragged through the mud, humiliated, and proven guilty.
10 THE LOST WORLD It made $90.2 million in one weekend. Breaking the previous record set by the Seinfeld cast.
11 JFK CLOTHING Someone’s trying to sell clothes in the President Kennedy style. Ohhh, just in time for the summer cotillion!
12 MICHAEL JACKSON He wants to build a $100 million theme park in Poland. It’s hard to believe Michael Eisner didn’t think of that first.
13 FLAMING PIE Sir Paul McCartney’s first studio album in four years. A little knight music.
14 JOAN LUNDEN She’ll be saying goodbye to Good Morning America. It’s been 20 years — or 884 new-and-easy-ways-to-cook-chicken segments.
15 WHEELCHAIR BARBIE Now there’s a Barbie for everyone — except the overweight and unattractive.