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The funniest online quotes for the week of Nov. 12

”You’d think a celebrity like me, with all my options, would have booked a Concorde to Australia. But I haven’t…. Wherever I was, I’ll find out in InStyle. In January.” – Being John Malkovich star Cameron Diaz on her plans for ushering in the new millennium, on

”My own kids haven’t seen most of my movies. Too upsetting. Mommy dies.” – Music of the Heart’s Meryl Streep, on