Sound Bites: The week's best TV quotes |


Sound Bites: The week's best TV quotes

TV's funniest lines from July 28 to August 4

”They’ve already started spraying mosquito spray all over New York City…. People tell me that it’s actually improved the quality of the air.”
David Letterman on Late Show

”Britney Spears had to move a concert planned for the Hollywood Bowl because her stage show is too big. A spokesperson said, ‘The Hollywood Bowl was only big enough for her left one.”’
Conan O’Brien on Late Night

”Doctors said that the test most commonly used to screen for colon cancer doesn’t go far enough. They’re recommending a procedure that involves photographing the entire colon. I say, don’t give CBS an idea for another reality show.”
Bill Maher on Politically Incorrect

”Three young fans of ‘N Sync walked 160 miles to an ‘N Sync concert. In a related story, three fans of Diana Ross walked 200 miles to get a refund.”
Jay Leno on The Tonight Show