Scott Brown
October 17, 2003 AT 04:00 AM EDT

In ”Dude, Where’s My Car?,” stunt-loving punk Ashton Kutcher aims to recover a car he lost the night before while highly intoxicated. Along the way, he and his fellow stoner pal (Seann William Scott) discover they’ve acquired cool new tattoos, encounter sexy-sexy sluts from another planet, and touch Christie Boner’s hoo-hoo. ALZHEIMER’S MOMENT ”Is it possible that we got so wasted last night we bought a lifetime supply of pudding and don’t remember?” CRYPTIC WISDOM ”Is it red? Then it isn’t a barn!”

In ”Dude, Where’s My Country?,” stunt-loving punk Michael Moore aims to recover a country he claims was lost to right-wingers while Americans were highly in-Fox-icated. Along the way, he learns the U.S. has acquired cool new debt, encounters sexy-sexy pundits, and touches on how he thinks George W. Bush landed us in deep doo-doo. ALZHEIMER’S MOMENT ”I, for one, will not forget Enron, and neither should you.” CRYPTIC WISDOM ”We took a piss on [France], biting into the whopper while freedom fried.”

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