Briefly visiting a few unlucky theaters on its way to a video store near you, Suspended Animation tells the tale of Thomas Kempton (Alex McArthur), an animator who survives imprisonment, torture, and laughably sub-Troma special effects at the hands of two cannibal sisters. But that’s not the end of the story! (Though, after nearly two hours of glacially paced, cluelessly acted schlock, you’ll see no reason why it shouldn’t have been.)
Describing what’s bad about this movie is like describing what’s orange about an orange, but suffice it to say that the best performance is given by a crucified raccoon. Director John Hancock (”Bang the Drum Slowly”) is a bold soul for leaving his John Hancock on this one.