Jim Mullen’s Hot Sheet for the week of April 30, 2004
1 THE RESTAURANT The NBC hit started its second year. Get in the mood by making them wait a half an hour before you tune in.
2 HARVEY WEINSTEIN He’s been honored by Queen Elizabeth for all he’s done for Britain. But especially for not living there.
3 COURTNEY LOVE She says her financial advisers were paying her dog walker $100,000 a year. Please, what kind of sick puppy would work for her for only $100,000 a year?
4 KEVIN SPACEY He says a man conned him out of his cell phone while he was walking his dog in a London park at 4:30 a.m. Here’s where it gets weirdit was Courtney Love’s dog.
5 13 GOING ON 30 Jennifer Garner wakes up to discover she’s aged 17 years overnight. It’s what Justin Timberlake would call ”a Botox malfunction.”
6 BARBRA STREISAND Her 60th recording, The Movie Album, has gone platinum. But she’s having it dyed to match her hair.
7 MAN ON FIRE Denzel Washington chases down the kidnappers of a little girl he was supposed to be protecting. Originally called Man Who Should Have Been Fired.
8 POOR PORN Production has shut down in California due to an HIV scare. All the actors will be forced to go back to doing Shakespeare and Moliere just for the money.
9 RUDOLPH VALENTINO A long-lost film of the silent-movie legend has been uncovered. Confirming it’s in B&W and has no car chases or special effects, film historians put it back where they found it.
10 PROM SEASON For many high schoolers, this will be their first chance to act like grown-ups. Picking a dress, getting a date, finding a babysitter for the kids.