We’re bad. We dug up a certain former love triangle to fill in the blanks of the ”send a personalized message from Hilary” feature on ”acinderellastory.com.” Is it our fault that this is how the message from Ms. Duff (in her actual voice!) to her onetime sweetie came out?
”Once upon a time there lived a very special mack daddy named Aaron, who lived in an enchanting, magical, mystical land called Florida. He wore only the finest clothes – like phony bling-bling that don’t cost a thing-thing – and spent most of the time doing really adventurous things, like flirting with everyone who has a pulse. Clearly, something was missing until magically, he met the love of his life – a diva named Lindsay – who fell in love with his totally irresistible half-man, half-boy peach fuzz and then they lived happily ever after.”