E! PLANS DAILY REENACTMENTS OF MICHAEL JACKSON TRIAL E! president Ted Harbert insisted the coverage will be ”deadly serious,” before presumably adding, ”But, you know, we are E! I mean…well, you know what I mean.”
JENNIFER GARNER’S ELEKTRA BUSTIER GOES ON SALE ON EBAY It was a full-on bidding war! Although I suppose that’s what happens when you have users named MVartan and SFoley.
VENDING MACHINE INDUSTRY LAUNCHES ANTI-OBESITY CAMPAIGN Isn’t this sorta like ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY starting a ”magazines suck” campaign? (They don’t, by the way.)
GWEN STEFANI’S DRESS STOLEN The good news is, she wasn’t wearing it at the time. Okay, not such good news if you’re a 15-year-old boy or fan of films like Zapped!, but otherwise pretty lucky.
FOX TO SELL UNAIRED EPISODES OF CANCELED REALITY SHOW PLAYING IT STRAIGHT ONLINE If you didn’t want to see it for free, you’ll definitely want to pay $9.99 to watch it all on a computer screen. No-brainer.
RICHARD HATCH TO PLEAD GUILTY TO FAILING TO REPORT HIS $1 MILLION SURVIVOR WINNINGS Oh, well, so much for his whole smartest person to ever play the game thing. He still has his nudity, at least.
KATHY GRIFFIN TAKES NO PRISONERS AT GOLDEN GLOBES Almost makes us forgive her for Celebrity Mole. Almost.
NYC POLICE SERGEANT SAYS DRUG DEALERS COPYING TACTICS SEEN ON THE WIRE Hey, at least they have good taste. It’s not like you’ll catch these guys ponying up $9.99 to check out lost episodes of Playing It Straight or anything.
MINNESOTA HITS MINUS 54 DEGREES Where’s freakin’ Jake Gyllenhaal? It’s The Day After the Day After Tomorrow!
APPRENTICE 3 BEGINS My ”street smarts” tell me to skip it.