The Pacifier | EW.com

Movies

The PacifierBlame it on Clint and that orangutan. In the '70s, he was probably the first slab of macho to domesticate his image by teaming with a costar worthy of a...The PacifierComedy, Action/Adventure, Kids and FamilyPT94MPGBlame it on Clint and that orangutan. In the '70s, he was probably the first slab of macho to domesticate his image by teaming with a costar worthy of a...2005-03-09Chris PotterFaith FordBrad GarrettLauren GrahamBrittany SnowChris Potter, Faith Ford, Brad Garrett, Lauren Graham, Brittany SnowWalt Disney Pictures
Vin Diesel, The Pacifier

(THE PACIFIER: Kerry Hayes)

D+

The Pacifier

Genre: Comedy, Action/Adventure, Kids and Family; Starring: Vin Diesel, Chris Potter, Faith Ford, Brad Garrett, Lauren Graham, Brittany Snow; Director: Adam Shankman; Author: Robert Ben Garant, Thomas Lennon; Release Date Wide: 03/04/2005; Status: In Season; Runtime (in minutes): 94; MPAA Rating: PG; Distributor: Walt Disney Pictures

Blame it on Clint and that orangutan. In the ’70s, he was probably the first slab of macho to domesticate his image by teaming with a costar worthy of a Dean Jones kiddie comedy. From there, it wasn’t such a big leap to Arnold and Kindergarten Cop and now, God help us, The Pacifier, a yawn-by-numbers romper-room dud that is nevertheless shrewd enough to tweak its star, Vin Diesel, for becoming a joke in less time than it took him to become an action hero.

Playing babysitter to a family of brats (he’s a Navy SEAL, in case you were wondering; they’re an assassinated scientist’s children, whom he’s been assigned to protect), Diesel, who looks like Uncle Fester’s frat-house-hooligan son, doesn’t interact with anyone. He just barks orders in that muscle-lipped monotone. You haven’t experienced a disgruntled lunk’s bad timing until you’ve seen a slice of baloney drop onto Vin, who, after a pause of about three hours, croaks out the line ”This is my favorite shirt!” The Pacifier appears to have been a good career move, but even Diesel may live to regret it when he discovers what flubber awaits him.

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