It’s upfront time (industry-speak for ”networks tell us what will be on in the fall”), so by the time you read this, one or more of your beloved programs will have been moved to a different time slot or, horrors, canceled. So what if the problem isn’t the show itself but the network it’s on? To the rescue: the first annual EW Draft, in which we suggest trades that would help everyone. Shorter than the NFL’s, but only marginally less effective!
ROUND 1 Fox’s heavy-on-the-wacky ad scheme hasn’t done Arrested Development any favors. Trade it to NBC to be paired up with equally edgy The Office in exchange for smutty Las Vegas and a player to be named later.
ROUND 2 FX sends its Denis Leary firefighter drama Rescue Me to NBC, filling the slot left by the departed Third Watch. NBC sends FX a lovely fruit basket, since, let’s face it, Fox already got NBC’s best show in round 1.
ROUND 3 Swap Jake in Progress with The Bernie Mac Show. Mac becomes the anti-Saget on ABC’s TGIF lineup, and Jake gets to look at more naked ladies on Fox, where they loves themselves those viewer discretion advisories.
ROUND 4 Tru Calling is revived by Fox and traded to UPN, where it teams up with Veronica Mars for a strong chick block. UPN sends Kevin Hill to Fox, where its pretty-people-doing-things-in-soft-light makes a nice follow-up to The O.C.