Fergie’s ”London Bridge”: Love it or loathe it?
This pop-music fan can only kneel and praise the brilliantly simple refrain and attitude-infused lyrics of Fergie’s ”London Bridge.” The Duchess deserves credit for her sassy vocals, but producer Polow Da Don (who crafted the Pussycat Dolls’ similarly sultry ”Buttons”) should procure the biggest props for his thumping beats. Sexy and assured, the track feels like an appropriate extension of the Black Eyed Peas singer’s image and talents. While a historic bridge might not be the most natural subject for a smokin’ single, even Queen Elizabeth II might shake her royal booty to this track. A- —Tim Stack
Those background boys yelling ”Oh, snap” may be impressed, but I’m not. ”London Bridge” ain’t dope, just dopey. Catchy is only a virtue when it’s joined by clever, as in ”Milkshake,” which ”London Bridge” desperately wants to be. And ladies, likening yourself to a moldy tourist trap really isn’t the best way to bring all the boys to the yard. Fergie might be a serviceable vocal accessory/fleshbot to the Peas, but she’s no Gwen?not when she sounds like a tipsy hollaback girl doing J-Kwon karaoke. Bottom line: No self-respecting party girl should bump her hump to this junk. D- —Jeff Jensen