”Rock Star: Supernova”: Dilana goes crazy
I saw something this week on Rock Star: Supernova that horrified and sickened me. And I’m not talking about Tommy Lee tongue-kissing Chopper the Dog. (Has he even had his shots? I mean Tommy, not the Supernova mascot.) No, I’m talking about seeing Dilana risk her front-runner status by going off the deep end.
First, she argued with Toby for the right to sing this week’s Wack Track, the Police’s ”Every Breath You Take.” Since Toby ran around the pool naked last week to get the song he wanted, he demanded that Dilana do the same, and she agreed. Her performance of the song was strikingly unspecial — the only bland performance she’s delivered to date. Not even the ginormous false pink eyelashes she wore (did Zayra leave them behind?) enlivened the song. At least Dilana had a dramatic excuse for wanting the song: It’s the favorite of her estranged mom, to whom she hasn’t spoken in years. (Like Sting’s stalker ode wasn’t already creepy enough.)
Dilana’s meltdown continued on Wednesday as she dominated the taped mansion segments by arrogantly dissing all the remaining male contestants. She said Ryan would be nothing without the house band behind him, called Toby a poseur, and said Lukas displayed a split personality that made her alternately want to mother him and beat him up. She also said she’d shoot Ryan (or any of the others) rather than accept some fans’ suggestion that she share the lead-singer position with another contestant.
Some of her insults came in comments to reporters; Supernova was apparently testing the competitors to see how they dealt with interviews, and Dilana was clearly not up to that aspect of the job she’s applying for. ”Obviously this week I’m the big bitch,” she observed. ”I’m too honest. I don’t know how to lie.” Dave Navarro was floored. The lesson, he suggested, was don’t slag your peers — and develop a thick skin.
Now, it’s possible that producer Mark Burnett and his team of evil geniuses were editing the footage to make Dilana look bad, in order to alienate her fans, take her down a peg in the voting, and make the competition less lopsided. But damn, girl! You’re 34, you’ve been a professional singer for much of your life, and you don’t know that you should behave discreetly in front of a camera? (Granted, neither does Tommy, but there’s room for only one lightning rod in Supernova.) You had the competition all sewn up with your performances; if you blow it by acting smug off stage, you’ll break a lot of hearts, including mine.
Maybe Dilana had reasons to snap at Ryan; as of this week, he’s her strongest rival. He snagged one of two original song slots this week, and his number, ”Back of Your Car” (about what you think it’s about), was his most assured performance yet. (How did he explain his newfound confidence? ”I got laid, dude.” Whoa, Ryan, too much information.) He certainly rocks, though it irks me that he’s so dour on stage — he’s never smiled or sung in a major key, Also, he’s derivative (yikes, Dilana’s right!), as judged by his guitar-tossing move. It would have looked spontaneous and rebellious, except that Tommy had suggested to Magni moments earlier that it’s okay to smash stuff on stage (this after Magni’s impeccable but danger-free cover of Nirvana’s ”Smells Like Teen Spirit”), and Dave had added, ”Before this season ends, I want to see something get broken up there.” I think what Ryan broke was the record for quickest attempt to pander to the judges.
Patrice, unlike the brooding Dark Horse (Dave’s new nickname for Ryan), was too chipper. She got the other original song, and her upbeat ”Beautiful Thing” made Tommy worry that it was a little too happy. But we can bring it down, he said. ”We have the technology.”
Like Dilana, Storm picked a weak song, just for the sake of the challenge, a decision she quickly regretted. Her cover of Aerosmith’s ballad ”Cryin’ ” saw her reverting to her worst tendencies. (Oh, no! The bug eyes are back!) The judges, however, generally seemed to like it (though Gilby Clarke found it insufficiently ”extra special”), apparently because she’s also gone back to skimpy stage wear. (Was she kidding when she said she’d borrowed her corset from Dave?)
Toby and Lukas also displayed their gimmicky stage flair. Toby marked his version of Eric Clapton’s ”Layla” by wearing a Ryan-esque hooded sweatshirt, then ripping it off to reveal his bare chest. Lukas got to sing the Killers’ ”All These Things That I’ve Done,” a song perfectly suited to his vocal range and dynamics. Lemur King spent his performance strutting, preening, and primping himself in the reflection off one of the backing musicians’ guitars. Gilby groused that Lukas spent too much time with his back to the audience. ”Two words,” said Tommy. ”Check, please.” Was that an insult or a compliment?
Early voting put Patrice, Storm, and Toby in the bottom three, but in the final tally, Storm was safe, replaced by Magni. The judges found it ”insane” that Toby finished so low, especially since they’d picked him to front the band that week on a new so-so Supernova track, ”Be Yourself and Five Other Clichés.” And after he defended himself with an acrobatic rendition of Stone Temple Pilots’ ”Plush,” the judges ruled he deserved to stay another week and sent him back to his seat. For his part, Magni sang an incendiary version of Jimi Hendrix’s ”Fire.” (Now, there’s a song where you should smash your guitar, or at least set it ablaze, as Hendrix used to do when he performed the tune.)
Patrice, aptly, sang the Pretenders’ ”Middle of the Road,” which is how naysayers have described her performances to date. Despite a weak start, she plowed through the song so ferociously that her lip started bleeding. (She seemed not to notice until after she finished singing, and Magni wiped the blood off on his sleeve.) That’s pretty rock & roll, but Supernova wasn’t about to ignore the fact that the voters had put her in the bottom three four times.
So, farewell, Ms. Pike. You weren’t really Supernova material, but you were a solid performer, and you were gracious to your peers. With Dilana raising hell around the mansion, I suspect your good manners will be sorely missed.
What do you think? Is Dilana in danger because of her boorish behavior? Is her frankness refreshing or unbearable? And can anyone besides Ryan challenge her for Supernova supremacy?