Michael Slezak
September 18, 2006 AT 07:53 PM EDT

Hey, PopWatchers. Won’t you grab a refreshing glass of Metamucil and join me in the Cranky Old Man zone? Today’s subject is the appalling movie poster for Saw III, which stopped me dead in my tracks and killed my appetite yesterday as I was innocently carrying my cinnamon-dusted pretzel and Diet Coke into the theater to catch Little Miss Sunshine. Now admittedly, I didn’t see Original Flavor Saw or its sequel — if there’s more to these films than watching helpless victims get tortured and snuffed out by a dude in a clown mask, please advise — but I really could have lived without the sight of a person’s upper lip being pulled back by a metal instrument to reveal his brutalized and bloodied gums. Okay, so the trio of teeth spelling out “III” is clever, but that doesn’t mean it shouldn’t lie beneath a plain brown wrapper. Am I right?

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