Michael Slezak
November 22, 2006 AT 11:15 PM EST

Over the river and through the woods — for some, that’s a loooong journey, and one that will require some pop-cultural distractions along the way.  I mean, how much chat about Aunt Frida’s goiter can a person handle, right? In that spirit, I present the following version of the (Long) Weekend To-Do List:

– Scientists have proven the polar opposite of discussing Aunt Frida’s goiter is watching Madonna: The Confessions Tour — Live From London (Wednesday, NBC, 8 p.m.). Would I make up something like that? (Alas, Madge and NBC have nixed the disco crucifixion, but she still writhes on a chair, as shown. Will that do?)

– Some twisted sadist at ABC decided to extend Grey’s Anatomy (Thursday, ABC, 9 p.m.) to 70 minutes this week. Set your DVR now, before you go into a turkey coma. You’ll thank me on Monday.

– Catch The Edge — no, I’m not going all Xtreme Sports on you, I’m talking about the dude from U2 — in Bono and The Edge: Off the Record, a sneak preview of erstwhile Eurythmic Dave Stewart’s new HBO late-night music/interview  series. (Friday, HBO, 11:00 p.m.)

– On the Web, Worth 1000’s “Superhero Casting Call” contest is pretty inspired. My favorite is Batman’s sidekick as The 40-Year-Old Virgin.

– The Beatles’ latest, a remix album called LOVE, gets an A from EW’s Chris Willman, and its good vibes might make the weekend’s traffic jams slightly less rage-inducing.

– Thomas Pynchon’s tome Against the Day also gets an A, from Ken Tucker, in the pages of EW; it could come in handy on Friday, in the event you are rendered inert from the previous day’s food-fest.

– And finally, if you’re at a loss for what to bring to this weekend’s festivities, you cannot go wrong with Chicken in a Biskit. If I have to explain, then it’s clear you haven’t indulged in a box in quite some time, if ever.

Anyhow, Happy Thanksgiving, and see you Monday!

addCredit(“Madonna: Gus Oseary/NBC”)

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