Ryan Seacrest and Carson Daly: The smackdown transcript! | EW.com

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Ryan Seacrest and Carson Daly: The smackdown transcript!


Cr_lYou probably know by now that Ryan Seacrest and Carson Daly are squaring off with competing New Year’s Eve specials come Sunday night – Seacrest sharing the spotlight on Dick Clark’s New Year’s Rockin’ Eve 2007 (ABC, 10 p.m.) and Daly headlining New Year’s Eve With Carson Daly, Presented by Chevrolet (NBC, 11:30 p.m.). What you may not know (probably because it didn’t happen) is that the hostbot rivals bumped into each other in a Whole Foods parking lot earlier today, things got heated, and PopWatch has the transcript.

Daly: Well if it isn’t Dick Clark’s little bitch!
Seacrest: Well if it isn’t the New Year’s host who pulled down less than half my audience in 2006!
Daly: At least I get my name in the title of my show.
Seacrest: Ooh, “Presented by Chevrolet”…way to keep it real.
Daly: You just keep drinking out of that Coca-Cola cup on Idol, okay?
Seacrest: And you just keep dreaming about having a New Year’s Rockin’ Eve.
Daly: Fair enough, that title kicks ass.
Seacrest: Mmkay?
Daly: Hey, remember when your daytime talk show got cancelled?
Seacrest: Yeah, just like your late-night talk show got cancelled.
Daly: What are you talking about, dumb-ass? My late-night talk show is still on the air.
Seacrest: Oh, that’s right. How could I forget? It finished right behind that Proactiv infomercial in the Nielsens last week.
Daly: And just ahead of your wretched E! News Daily.
Seacrest: That was so funny I forgot to laugh.
Daly: What are you, in third grade?
Seacrest: I know you are but what am I?
Daly: Remember how you flirted with Simon Cowell all last season?
Seacrest: Remember when all the gossip blogs posted pictures of you looking like Skeletor?
Daly: Remember when all the gossip blogs posted pictures of you making out with Skeletor…er, I mean, Teri Hatcher?

Seacrest: Seriously? You wanna go there? Two words for you: Tara Reid.
Daly: Oh yeah? Three words for you: Jennifer Love Hewitt.
Seacrest: Holy crap! I forgot you dated her. She has the clearest skin.
Daly: I know, dude. She’s prettier than a Disney princess and smoother than a baby’s ass.
Seacrest: Whoa, that reminds me, I’ve got an appointment for a facial in a half hour.
Daly: You do?
Seacrest: Yeah.
Daly: That sounds fun.
Seacrest: Totally.
[Awkward pause]
Seacrest: Wanna come with?
Daly: Dude! I thought you’d never ask

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