Let’s face it: If you’re reading this blog, you are already perfect. (Yes, I’m buttering you up, but you love butter, right?) Come Jan. 1, you will not subscribe to the late Aaliyah’s hypnotic hit, “We Need a Resolution.” In the spirit of the season, however, I’d like you to spread some of that perfection around. So here’s what I’m suggesting: Reach into the giant PopWatch beret, pull out the name of a poor, misguided star, and offer some advice for salvaging his or her sagging career/life. I’ll get the party started with the easiest of targets – Britney Spears. Sure, I could have her resolve to visit Victoria’s Secret and invest in 366 pairs of panties (my mom always taught me to have an extra one in your luggage – just in case), but I’m gonna do something crazy and try to focus on Brit’s music career. (Remember that?) Here goes…“For 2007, I, Britney Spears, resolve to do something musically unexpected and interesting. When I record my inevitable comeback disc, I’m going to pass on working with Timbaland, Scott Storch, the Neptunes, and Kara DioGuardi – or anybody else that everybody else works with. Instead, I’m going to pair up with an overlooked but talented singer-songwriter – like Pink did when she tracked down Linda Perry to produce Missundaztood – and cook up something fierce and unforgettable. In fact, right now I’m going to get my manager to track down Imani Coppola, Edie Brickell, and Jody Watley (I wonder if she’d let me cover that “Makeover” song on her MySpace page) to set up meetings – during normal business hours, of course. I’ve got two kids now, so I really need to be home most nights to spend a little time with them.”Whew! That was easy – and kinda fun! Try it for yourself, PopWatchers…there are singers, writers, actors, and directors just begging for your help – whether they know it or not.
Posted January 18 2015 — 7:47 AM EST
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