Kathy Griffin is all about awards shows lately: At the Creative Arts Emmy Awards on Sept. 8, everyone’s favorite ”D-list” celebrity took home her first Emmy, an Outstanding Reality Program statue for Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D-List. And when EW caught up with her two days later to chat about it, Griffin’s awards weren’t the only ones that had her fired up. The comedian whipped out her razor-sharp tongue to give Sunday’s sad Video Music Awards telecast a much-needed lashing.
ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY: How excited are you to have won the Creative Arts Emmy?
KATHY GRIFFIN: I am absolutely over the moon. I was absolutely convinced I was going to lose. I had a bit planned and I was very focused on my bit, and so when the camera was in front of me, I didn’t think that I won. This is how D-list these Emmys are: three nominees didn’t even show up! It was me and Caesar Millan. Yeah, it was me and the Dog Whisperer all day.
What’d you have planned if you didn’t win? A Faith Hill-type outburst?
Well, you know what I did last year when I lost, which I’m very proud of: I stood up, I flipped off the winners from Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, and I screamed, ”I was robbed and you all know it! Everybody can suck it!” and stormed off. I got in trouble, but I still thought it was funny.
What was this year’s plan?
One of my friends said, ”I think it’d be funny if, when Extreme Makeover wins, you run up on stage anyway as if you won.” I was going to run up on stage and I’m not kidding, I was planning it. I was in the front row and I thought, I’m going to run as fast as I can up there and thank all the people that’ve been there for me and supported me and all that s—, and that was going to be my bit, and then I was going to try to grab the Emmy and go back to my seat until security took me away. It would’ve been sort of like a Kid Rock-Tommy Lee before the Kid Rock-Tommy Lee incident even happened.
And when you did win, you pointedly did not thank Jesus in your acceptance speech, right?
Here’s what I said exactly: ”A lot of people get up here and thank Jesus for helping them win this award, but I have to say nobody has been less helpful in getting me to this moment than Jesus. I don’t know what I ever did to him, I just think he doesn’t like me that much, and if he had his way, Caesar Milan would be holding this statue right now, but he’s not and I am! So I guess all I can really say is, ‘Suck it, Jesus! This statue is my God now!”’
How’d the crowd react when you said that?
They actually laughed! So that’s been so great about the D-List show. It’s so great that people know, like, I’m actually kidding. So it was great to not get booed off the stage and have people throw burning crosses at me. I don’t think you can bring a burning cross to the Emmys. It was like, ”Oh good, they’re finally getting that I’m just kidding.” [Apparently, not everyone outside the room was laughing — following complaints about her speech by Catholic League President Bill Donohue, the Academy of Television Arts & Sciences said in a statement Monday that ”Kathy Griffin’s offensive remarks will not be part of the E! telecast” of the Creative Arts Emmy Awards, scheduled for Sept. 15. Responded Griffin in a statement sent to EW.com via a rep: ”Am I the only Catholic left with a sense of humor?”] I’m looking at that statue right now and I just…I carry it everywhere. I take it to the bathroom when I pee. It’s always in my hand.
NEXT PAGE: Kathy Griffin on the VMAs (”a disaster”) and Britney (”She was looking to the girl to her right, like when I was in dance class in high school and didn’t want to be there”)