So my colleague Shirley Halperin got talking to Queer Eye for the Straight Guy star Carson Kressley at the Maxim Style Awards on Tuesday night, when (of course) the subject of Britney Spears came up. “She should just start over, clean slate,” offered Kressley. “But her problems shouldn’t be plastered all over the newspapers. That’s really sad and it’s affecting all those people’s lives, especially her kids. Maybe she should hire me as her manny. I could probably whip things into shape. It could be a reality show — Carson and Britney Get It Together!”
I know Kressley was probably saying this in jest — well, actually, I don’t know that at all, though if he’s suggesting she stay out of the tabloids, surely he can’t think reality programming is the answer — but it struck me that he’s now the second reality star who’s offered his coaching skills to the troubled pop tart. Earlier this month, Simon Cowell suggested he and his American Idol cohorts, Randy Jackson and Paula Abdul, could lead Spears back to chart dominance/social redemption. (Insert your own Hey Paula joke here.)
This got me thinking: What about a reality competition in which celebrity life coaches compete for the chance at taking over the management of Spears’ personal and professional life? In addition to Kressley and Cowell, producers could enlist Dr. Phil, Martha Stewart, Deepak Chopra, Oprah, and maybe even the Dalai Lama (who could certainly use a boost with the 18-34 demographic) to enter the fray. Then again, considering Spears isn’t the only celebu-beast who needs what Tyra Banks would call a “high-fashion ass-whuppin’,” maybe it’d be a better idea to reopen the Starting Over house for business. I’m not the only one who missesIyanla Vanzant’s insane, tough-love platitudes on my weekday mornings, am I?
What think ye, P-Dubs? Y’all want to suggest some other high-profile contestants for RemakingBritney Spears? Or do you have a better pitch for a Spears-based program altogether?