Aubry D'Arminio
October 09, 2007 AT 08:19 PM EDT

Danke to Fox for disclosing the contents of Susan B.’s mysterious, icky-sticky gift box within the first fifteen of last night’s episode.  Waiting out the minutes, or hours, or days for a big reveal (“What’s in the hatch?” “Are you on the list?” “Who is Don Draper?”) distracts from details that are key to serials like PB.  Plus, you know I likes me a gory moment or two — and it’s close enough to Halloween. 

But Sara’s severed head, mouth open and hair drenched? Really? That’s too easy and I won’t buy any bunk about the simplicity of it being genius.  As y’all pointed out, we’ve seen this before.  Boring. Boring. Boring.  And, might I add, poor girl.  Also, who is this PB hairdresser giving away show secrets? For shame! (Seriously though, I like spoilers, so keep ’em coming, just warn us first). 

Back to business, should Lincoln really hold back this new development from his brother? I get it, he feels guilty.  He’s kinda been moping for three seasons now, anyway.  But you know Linc’s being a little bit selfish:  If Michael (who, let’s just say, hasn’t been psychologically A1 for quite awhile) falls to pieces, he might not break Whistler out, and thus might not save Lincoln’s weak-link son, L.J.  Then again, I guess it can’t really be self-centered to want to help your kid.  Either way, Mike’s gonna be rip-roaringly pissed at someone.   

So Tancredi’s gone (unless she pulls a Sherry Stringfield on ER, and begs for her job back, then shows up like Silas Weir Mitchell did last night — which BTW, I thought was lame).  Disappointingly, PB writers aren’t kind to well-educated female characters that have pulled themselves up from poverty or drug addiction to make good.  They usually end up with either all or part of their skull missing.  Here’s hoping that Sofia dropped out of high school, because who didn’t get all warm and gooey inside when she and Whistler touched hands through the gate?  I’ve already said she’s appallingly beautiful and her character gives him heart.  I’m actually hoping he’s not a sneaky bastard — just for her sake.   

Speaking of sneaky bastards: I naively assumed T-Bag was having somesort of emotional growth spurt when he helped Lechero’s underling offthe floor and told him to keep his chin up. Not that I was surprisedwhen he suffocated the kid, stuck a drug needle in his arm, and tookover his position as Lechero’s majordomo. Here’s hoping all theseside-plots will converge soon and that T-Bag will be central to thebreakout, rather than just supplying Michael with a cell phones andAlex with drugs.

Did anyone catch the significance of the soccer game Lechero waswatching? Dates, times, scores, anything that could lead us tosomething? I’m desperate for clues and I think there was somethinghere. We also know that Susan sent Whistler the fake bird guide withthe note “You’re running out of time.” (Did they really have to put itin a bright blue envelope? I think we would have noticed it anyway).And I’m taking a good look at the murals in Sona. Don’t they remind youof Mike’s tattoos, right down to the religious and mythological imagery(his new cell has Hell on one wall and Jesus on the other)? It’s allleading up to the big escape — let’s theorize how. To quote formerEngland Manager Kevin Keegan, “I know what is around the corner — Ijust don’t know where the corner is.”

(P.S. Mad Men also added a “What’s in the Box?” plotline last week.  And have you noticed that the plots of Heroes and PB both revolve around a controlling corporate/government entity called “the Company?”)   

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