Benjamin Svetkey
November 09, 2007 AT 05:00 AM EST

Two sides of the strike

WINNER: Reality fans
My Dad Is Better Than Your Dad? Bring it on.
LOSER: Frosh shows
Bionic Woman, look out! A winter sabbatical could kill new series that have lured only middling ratings this fall.

WINNER: The blogosphere
The unhappiest place on earth will receive an influx of unemployed screed-slingers. At least this batch respects the grammar gods.
LOSER: Authors of political books
Where will they shill their doorstopping opuses if Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert stay off the air?

WINNER: Kinko’s
Picket signs, résumés cranked out at an all-time high.
LOSER: Kleenex
No soaps=fewer tears.

WINNER: L.A. Galaxy
Scribes discover L.A. has a pro soccer team…with David Beckham!
LOSER: L.A. working class
Costumers, drivers, caterers, set designers, and others cool their heels as production halts.

WINNER: Four Seasons Resort Hualalai, Hawaii
The holiday exodus starts a month earlier this year.
LOSER: Starbucks
No more writers pulling all-nighters.

The chances for a Hollywood comeback increase 10,000-fold with new demand for cross-dressing reality dating shows.
LOSER: Ron Paul
The chances for a come-from-way-behind Republican nomination decrease 10,000-fold as HBO’s Real Time With Bill Maher goes dark.

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