Michael Slezak
December 04, 2007 AT 06:45 PM EST

In light of the news that Jordin Sparks recently scored the lowest total first-week sales (119,000) and the lowest first-week chart position (No. 10) among six American Idol champs to date…and seeing as Blake Lewis’s Audio Day Dream got socked with a tepid C review from our own Chris Willman in this week’s EW…and keeping in mind season 5’s “unhip” Elliott Yamin is still getting airplay even after more “marketable” Taylor Hicks and Katharine McPhee have hit the bargain bin…I figured I’d ask the good folks at 19 Entertainment whether or not they’d gotten around to signing season 6’s third-place finisher Melinda Doolittle to a recording contract.

Yes, I know, she doesn’t have Jordin’s youthful appeal, or Blake’s hipster musical tastes, but the woman possesses a monster truck of a voice, and the world needs more monster trucks! And personally, I’d like to see her drive it right through the rocky chart terrain left barren in the absence of Tina Turner, followed by the smooth-jazzy territory once occupied by Anita Baker.

Alas–and I know you know this is coming–a 19 spokesperson’s response, received via email yesterday afternoon, contained a single, sad sentence: “She is not signed to 19 Recordings.”

Help me make sense of this, PopWatchers! Because it’s not right, and it’s not okay. And don’t even get me started on LaKisha Jones.

Oh yes, you know I went there.

addCredit(“Melinda Doolittle: Kelly A. Swift/Retna”)

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