1 Publisher of Tila Tequila book claims ”the world cannot get enough of Tila Tequila”
I think she’s confusing Tila Tequila with actual, delicious tequila.
2 Attorney says Brit and K-Fed’s relationship is improving
The court papers they regularly serve each other are now folded in those cute ”secret note squares,” with ”Yes,” ”No,” and ”Sue me?” boxes inside.
3 At a concert in France, Madonna kisses female backup dancer on stage
Except this time it was less sexy and more Granny-stop-it-you’re-embarrassing-me.
4 Without mentioning Ryan Reynolds, Alanis says she hit ”rock bottom” after breakup
She didn’t give details, but fans are already poring over the lyrics to her cryptic new single, ”Scarlett Johansson Is a Flaming Bag of Ho.”
5 Lohan says she wasn’t fired from Charlie Manson movie
And she denies that Manson himself said she was ”too crazy, man.”
6 Jean-Claude Van Damme stars as himself in Jean-Claude Van Damme biopic
It’s the role he was born to play.
7 Charges dropped against Anne Hathaway’s boyfriend after he wrote a bad check for $215,000
Look, sometimes it’s late, you really want a Fabergé egg, and you don’t have time to check your account balance.
8 Dennis Farina says he accidentally brought a loaded gun to the airport
Dennis, this is no way to get back on Law & Order.
9 Hillary booster Harvey Weinstein denies reports he threatened to cut off Dem donations
At this point, though, said ”donations” consist of Grindhouse totes and free Hoodwinked promo DVDs.
10 Alvin and the Chipmunks sequel greenlit Theodore admits he was the holdout, but denies feuding with Simon and refusing to sign for a pay scale lower than Alvin’s.
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