1. Oprah’s endorsement of Obama worth up to a million votes
Each voter expects to find a new Pontiac under their booth on Election Day.
2. No Dark Knight videogame expected anytime soon
Programmers say there are still a few moral ambiguities to work out.
3. George Lazenby, infamous onetime Bond, preps for custody battle
It’s the fans’ least-favorite custody battle, but it has its defenders.
4. Matthew McConaughey wants newborn’s placenta planted in an orchard, speaks of ”placenta tree” If the crop comes in strong he hopes to wean us off foreign placenta by 2012.
5. Lauren Conrad to design official gowns of 60th Emmys
The Two Coreys will run the cameras, and Flavor Flav will direct.
6. Richard Dreyfuss sues relatives over an alleged unpaid loan
They then countersued for pain and suffering inflicted by Krippendorf’s Tribe.
7. Cheech and Chong reuniting for tour
Why not? They’re at that age where anything you smoke is automatically ”medicinal.”
8. Advocacy groups boycott Tropic Thunder over ”mocking” of the intellectually disabled
Apparently this is the first Ben Stiller movie they’ve seen.
9. Rick Springfield back on the charts
Plus, Russia’s invaded a neighboring state and banks everywhere are failing. Looks like it’s safe for me to wear my old Jams!
10. Tori Spelling out of new 90210, reportedly because she was to be paid less than Jennie Garth, Shannen Doherty
”I’m not falling down another flight of stairs for less than $50,000 per episode!”