Question: What’s the latest on Sara Ramirez exiting Grey’s Anatomy? — Hanna
Ausiello: Um, I think you got your bisexuals mixed up. Dr. Hahn was given the boot, not her girlfriend. A Grey’s insider assures me that Sara Ramirez “isn’t going anywhere.” Of course, then he suggested I check in once a week for the remainder of the show’s run. You know, just to be safe.
Question: What the heck about Brooke Smith leaving on Grey’s Anatomy? And her last episode is this Thursday? And Hahn’s final scene consists of her leaving work for the day? Insanity. — Keith
Ausiello: I’m going to give Shonda Rhimes the benefit of the doubt and assume she’s intentionally leaving Hahn’s exit ambiguous and, therefore, open to interpretation. Sort of like the Sopranos finale. Did Hahn get shot to death on the way to the parking garage? Did she pull a Thelma & Louise and drive her car off a cliff? Did the hospital’s automatic doors malfunction and decapitate her? Did she return to Weeds? The possibilities are endless. Personally, I’m leaning toward the Thelma & Louise scenario. According to one of my Grey’s moles, Callie and Erica have a relationship-severing blowout in tomorrow’s episode that starts with an argument over whether Izzie paid a big enough price for her role in Denny-gate, and ends with Callie realizing she doesn’t love girls as much as Erica does. Hey, people have killed themselves over less.
Question: Is the ER episode featuring the return of Anthony Edwards going to be ridiculous and unrealistic, or will longtime fans appreciate it? — Megan
Ausiello: Worry not — your favorite hospital hasn’t turned into a dead-raising hellmouth. Dr. Greene only appears in flashbacks, where we learn the tragedy behind Dr. Banfield’s (Angela Bassett) thorny exterior: Greene couldn’t save Banfield’s son from a particularly bad case of acute leukemia, and he died in the very ER she now works in. Ouch, right? We also get a brief glimpse of our old pal Robert “Rocket” Romano (Paul McCrane). Don’t blink, or you’ll miss him.
Question: I’m sick of politics. Make me forget all about it with some Life on Mars scoop! — Joel
Ausiello: Okay, but it’s the day after the election so I have to warn you: I may infuse my answer with a voting-related pun or two. Sources confirm to me exclusively that Life on Mars has elected (tee-hee) Eric Balfour to play the younger brother of Michael Imperioli’s cop character. His airdate is TBD.
Question: I just watched last week’s episode of The Office. Please tell me this isn’t the last we’ll see of Amy Ryan! — Patric
Ausiello: Well, at least based on what Aushole Mark tells me, there’s still some hope. “The writers slipped up,” he says. “They keep saying how the drive is so long and would take all day. The deleted scenes even say it’s a seven-hour trip. Actually, though, it’s a pretty straight shot between the two cities. I-84 gets you from Scranton to northern Mass, and then Nashua’s just across the border. To meet halfway they’d each only have to drive a little over two hours. Either Holly was making excuses, or everyone in the episode was wrong about the geography.” Maybe they just took a lot of wrong turns along the way?
Question: I’ve had a lousy week at work, actually pondered whacking the boss over the head with a large and very heavy hardback book (perk of being a librarian — lots of potential weapons), so please make my week better and potentially spare a lovely coffee-table book the indignity of giving my battle-axe of a boss a concussion with some Samantha Who? scoop. — Tess
Ausiello: Wow, how could I even consider refusing a librarian with violent tendencies? I suggest you drink some decaf and look forward to the upcoming episode in which Sam starts to hear her biological clock ticking. Loudly. So loudly, in fact, that to prepare herself for motherhood, she practices with a dog. (I said with a dog, not on a dog. You guys are gross.)
Question: How about some Gossip Girl scoop? Maybe something on the possibility of Nate and Jenny being preggers. Please?? — Liz
Ausiello: Can I interest you in something else? Old man Bart has a brother we never met, but that’s about to change. His name is Jack, and here’s the twist: Dude’s only 30! (Apparently, Mom’s dry spell started in the early 1900s and didn’t end until almost 1980.)
Question: Now that we’ve seen the big House-Cuddy smooch, what can we expect next from these two? — Samantha
Ausiello: They’re moving in together on Dec. 2! Sort of. The collateral damage resulting from the upcoming hostage crisis at Princeton Plainsboro will force Cuddy to temporarily move into House’s office, which creates an even bigger crisis. Picture War of the Roses only with different leads and only slightly less attempted murder.
Question: Any info you have on House and Cuddy would be great! Will there be another kiss? — Kourtney
Ausiello: No kissing in the immediate future, although there will be some light fondling.
Question: Riddle me this: How is it that the Fox promo for next Tuesday’s House is completely focused on House and Cuddy, even though everyone (you included, my friend) has been hyping it for months as focused on Chase and Cameron? Are the blond lovebirds even going to share more than the already-spoiled surgery and make-out scene, or was this just more empty promises? — Emily
Ausiello: Okay, first off, simmer. Second, simmer some more. And third, keep simmering while I give you the facts about next Tuesday’s ep: Chase and Cameron are not in every scene, but issues surrounding their relationship — specifically, her reluctance to make room for him in her life (literally and figuratively) — loom large throughout the hour. Hameron also gets a fair amount of face time in the episode, since the victim-of-the-week is a former patient of Cam’s.
Question: So now that Obama’s campaign is over, what do you think Rory is going to do with herself? — Anna
Ausiello: She’s heading to New York to see her mom on Broadway!
Question: Did I miss the scoop that Sarah Drew was going to be on Privileged?! — Kristin
Ausiello: You sure did. We also elected a new president yesterday and Grey’s Anatomy is down one lesbian. You should be all caught up now.
Question: Why is no one is talking about how perfect this season of Friday Night Lights is? My only quibble: The evil cowboy dude needs to leave so Tyra and Landry can be together. — Aditi
Ausiello: I’m just getting caught up on all the episodes I missed, so that’s why I’ve been giving the show the silent treatment. But now I can join you in celebrating the beauty that is season 3. The stuff I’m loving the most: Matt reconnecting with his estranged mom (Deadwood MVP Kim Dickens, who I’m convinced was put on Earth just to make me cry); Jason’s heartbreaking (and still unfolding) farewell arc; the fact that producers are making J.D. McCoy a sympathetic figure and not some cliché-ridden spoiled rich brat (a lesser show would’ve gone there); getting Landry off the football field and into a garage band where he belongs; and, of course, any and every scene with Connie Britton. As far as the evil cowboy dude goes, he’s not bugging me as much as I thought he would. But a word of warning: He’s going to seem more evil than ever tonight when a skeleton tumbles out of his closet and right onto Tyra’s doorstep.
Question: I heart Friday Night Lights. I know you do, too! How about some Matt-Julie scoop? — Meghan
Ausiello: They do the deed in tonight’s episode. And by that I mean they…
A. Go swimming in a lake
B. Go for a ride in his new car
C. Have sex
D. Have a fireside chat
E. All of the above
F. None of the above
The comments section awaits your pick! (And no cheating!)
Question: I heard a rumor Scott Porter is now working on Lost. Is there any truth to this? — DJ
Ausiello: Did I start that rumor? If not, I should have, because that would be awesome. Unfortunately, Porter tells me he’s heard “no mention” of a possible Lost gig. (Speaking of Lost, this week’s Ausiello TV has fresh scoop and a cameo by Doc Jensen!)
Question: Got any scoop on the series finale of The Shield? — Thomas
Ausiello: Yes, but I better slap a “major spoiler alert” on this thing: The 90-minute capper on Nov. 25 features at least four significant deaths. Pick up this week’s issue of EW for two bonus spoilers and a mini-critique of the final scene.
Question: I know it’s a ways off, but I have important Greek questions: Does next season pick up right where we left off? Are we still in Rusty’s freshman year? And does that mean we will not see Dale until season 3? — DJ
Ausiello: “We’ll finally be out of Rusty’s freshman year,” reveals Greek creator Sean Smith of season 2.5, which kicks off next March. “When we return, it’s the fall of his second year and Casey and the upperclassmen’s fourth. It’ll be a whole new year, with rush (like the pilot) all over again, new pledges, new fun!” And what about Dale? “He’ll definitely be around,” says Smith. “Only this year he’s living in Calhoun Hall as Rusty moves into the Kappa Tau house.” And just like God said in the finale, Rusty and Dale will be roommates again. But with a twist. And a funny one at that.
Question: Tina Fey is perfect. Jon Hamm is hot. This has to happen! Please tell me it’s a done deal. — A Patel
Ausiello: Sure sounds like it, since my Rock-solid mole says they’re currently casting “multiple family members” for his character, who, it turns out, is a doctor.
Question: What’s the scoop on Pushing Daisies? Is it true it’s going to be canceled? — Mark
Ausiello: It’s true that it continues to not look good. The show just started production on the last episode of its 13-episode order. And barring an 11th-hour back-nine pickup by ABC, Daisies may shut down for good next week. That’s your cue to click here. And here. Oh, and here’s a scoop about what could (but hopefully won’t) be the final Daisies episode ever: Wendy Malick and Nora Dunn have been cast as the Darling Mermaid Darlings’ rivals from back in the day.
Question: I’m hearing that Ned in Pushing Daisies will temporarily lose his “touch” in an upcoming episode. Is it true? Any info about how this would affect his untouchable love story with Chuck? Maybe we’ll get the chance to see a real kiss? — Valeria
Ausiello: Sounds like a question for series creator Bryan Fuller! “Hello, Valeria! Ned doesn’t so much as lose his ‘touch’ as decides not to use it for various dramatic reasons. So no change in the rules for his touching or not touching Chuck. But what’s wrong with a prophylactic kiss? You can’t say we’re not doing our part at Daisies to teach birth control! Best, Bryan.”
Question: Got any scoop on season 8 of According to Jim? By the way, why do you hate that show? — Jackson
Ausiello: Hate the show? What crack pipe are you smoking? According to Jim is genius personified. I mean, check out the talent they’ve lined up for their likely series finale (airing sometime hopefully never): Dan Aykroyd, Eric Estrada, and Lee Majors. What’s not to love?
That’s all, folks! Send questions/anonymous tips/random stuff to firstname.lastname@example.org. (Additional reporting by Lynette Rice, Oriana Schwindt, and Andy Patrick)