Alien attack movies: How to survive |


Alien attack movies: How to survive

Our breakdown of the (lame) ways ''Mars Attacks,'' ''Signs,'' and more saved the planet from extinction

Even before the new Day the Earth Stood Still, aliens have been trying to wipe out our planet. And we keep stopping them — in breathtakingly lame ways. Be warned: Spoilers follow.

Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home
Alien Plan: Sap the planet’s energy and evaporate its oceans.
Human Counterplan: Travel back in time to find humpback whales.

Mars Attacks!
Alien Plan: Vaporize Earth with lasers, prankster glee, and obnoxious laughter.
Human Counterplan: The high-pitched yodel of singer Slim Whitman.

Independence Day
Alien Plan: Raze entire cities with a massive, expanding fireball.
Human Counterplan: A computer virus sent via Jeff Goldblum’s Apple laptop.

Men In Black
Alien Plan: Blow up Earth to obliterate ”the Galaxy,” a giant energy source.
Human Counterplan: Find the Galaxy — a trinket on a cat’s collar.

Alien Plan: Hand-to-hand combat coordinated with crop circles.
Human Counterplan: Water. It’s toxic to the aliens…who invaded a planet covered with it.