Annie Barrett
January 05, 2009 AT 12:00 PM EST

Former American Gladiator Nitro, who likes to use the decoy name “Dan Clark” as he wanders the lowly earth, will publish a book next month, Gladiator: A True Story of ‘Roids, Rage, and Redemption. You can read all about his struggles with man-boobs and shrinkage at Page Six (or just buy the book, although, yeah right), but to me this is less a reason to mock the guy’s genital deterioration than it is an EXCELLENT excuse to point you to this clip of Nitro guest-starring on season 2, episode 19 of Ellen! They made such a wacky, chemically imbalanced romantic pair. I’m shocked it didn’t work out.

Just me, or does anyone else always hear ‘rrhoid, as in hemmorrhoid, instead of ‘roid?

Huh.

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