Kate Ward
December 08, 2009 AT 10:19 PM EST

“The Governator” and Marky Mark don’t hold a candle to Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino. Not only did last Thursday’s Jersey Shore introduce us mini-sluts and Italian-inspired decor that would embarrass the likes of Fat Tony, but also to the man with the Best. Nickname. Ever. Yes, we’re talkin’ about “The Situation.” (Which, at last check, is currently under control, folks.) So how better to celebrate the petri dish that is Jersey Shore than to create a nickname generator inspired by the MTV series?

Well, the blog Unlikely Words has done just that. And let me tell you, the results are bellissimo. So enter your name, and tell us what your Jersey Shore moniker is! (The generator first named me “Snickers,” then “The Rack.” I’m not sure which one is worse, but I’ll take the latter as a compliment.)

Disclaimer: The generator only cycles through a few dozen nicknames. As my colleague Tanner Stransky says, “That’s Jersey for you!”

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