Leah Greenblatt
March 12, 2010 AT 05:00 AM EST

”yes i think i desewve to upgrade and big knows what hes getting into hes a calculator whyarent i more beduatiful sometimes? good t and a ?”
Translation: ”I would like to date a man of quality, though sometimes I doubt my own physical attributes.”

”Yay oir Nay Pittster? ah well the less said there, hmm his gf atth3e time had a bibccat, and he farted alot (not pitt but bobcat) NAY”
Translation: ”I am too discreet to say much of this particular gentleman, other than that his former companion’s feline was gassy.”

”bean t hauy gace you a gene tierney classic silver hwood dress jlo owre once its petite for you and so beuatiul classic dita will be jealous”
Translation: ”You look very nice today.”

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