Ali Goldstein/NBC
Margaret Lyons
March 26, 2010 AT 04:00 AM EDT

If there?s something more magnificent than being frozen in carbonite á la Han Solo, I don?t know what it is. A terrific 30 Rock? Well? maybe porn for women, fidelity complexes, and Wesley Snipes. No, a different Wesley Snipes. These were the 10 best lines from ”Don Geiss, America, and Hope.”

”Not Seinfeld, Friends, ER exciting, more like 3-D episodes of Merlin exciting?” — Jack, who just whipped a battery at Liz

”He built GE into the greatest company on Earth, and the Earth into one of the top three planets in the universe!” — Jack, who knows Legoland is no match for the Bruins

”My addiction to prescription glasses! The fact that I suffer from attention deficit disor? Jack, your shoes are shiny!” — Tracy, whose Ben and Jerry?s flavor is Adulteraisin

”I?m British and charming, and she?s got? angles? that work for her.” — Wesley, who hates Cathy cartoons

”It?s like a black Barbie doll in Arizona! Nobody?s buying it!” — Tracy, who was supposed to ride on a Cinco de Mayo float with John Edwards

Assatar? The Lovely Boners? The Hind Side? Fresh-Ass: Based on the Novel ?Tush? by Assfire?” — Jack, who?s the reason the microwave tray rotates

”?commencing eyeroll sequence?” — Liz, who knows from a Lizaster

”At one point my obituary was going to read ?CEO of GE dies violently in casino orgy?!” — Jack, who?s settling

”What if women had a pay-per-view channel featuring handsome men patiently listening to them? What if they had porn for women?” — Jack, who?s ready to make

”I?ll see you in May! For sweeps! That what?s we call spring cleaning in England!” — Wesley? Snipes

All that and Kenneth playing the organ? Win, win, win, a thousand times win.

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