Annie Barrett
April 12, 2010 AT 08:00 PM EDT

Image Credit: Adam Larkey/ABCAs you’ll see tonight if you tune in to the Week 4 performance episode of ABC’s Dancing With the Stars, Kate Gosselin is a terrible ballroom dancer. Ninety-nine percent of the Internet (but not Jane Seymour) seems to hate her. There are “Free Tony” t-shirts for sale (the ‘O’ is a purple disco ball)! Our Lady of Perpetual Metaphor (Bruno Tonioli) is making the late-night rounds, talking about how “dreadful” her dancing is. (“But in a nice way!”) Jimmy Fallon reenacted her stone-faced “Paparazzi” paso doble. She’s embroiled in custody disputes with Jon and has a new TLC show planned, called Twist of Kate. (Please have nothing to do with dancing! I see your use of ‘twist’ and raise you a hearty ‘hell to the no!’) No one understands who is voting to keep her in — except ABC, who’s lovin’ it like some Chicken Selects.

The Kate Gosselin Media Spectacle Spectacular has been bad before, but has it ever been this gross? When does this rancid milk expire? Are you amused by the season 10 circus, or is it time to put a once-great nation out of its misery and vote Kate off Planet Mirrorballus?

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‘DWTS’ Crazy Costume Watch: Week 3!

Annie on Twitter: @EWAnnieBarrett

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