Look, Justin Bieber is an easy target for the Oldie Olsen community*. He’s got hair so fluffy and magical, it could be the title character in a long lost Beatrix Potter story. He’s already made more money this year than you** and I will probably earn in a lifetime combined. And he’s displaying possible narcissistic tendencies via a new “thank-you video” for his fans set to a song called “Love Me.” (I mean, seriously, if he’s saying “thank you,” shouldn’t he set it to a song called “Love You“? Then again, you try juggling global hero worship and trigonometry and see what it does to your head.)
But let’s put aside our crotchety gripes for a moment, because there are reasons to celebrate the 16-year-old Canadian singer-ubiquitous Twitter trending topic. Think about it: In less than a year, he’ll be 17, and there will inevitably be people who will think it’s a good idea for little Justin to pull a Miley Cyrus and show us he’s all grown up and ready to film his own coming-of-age video/lusty bacchanal. I know, I know…you’re not ready to imagine The Bieb strapping a pair of wings to his naked back and writhing around with a troupe of scantily clad dancers while spitting lyrics like “Every girl everywhere just gives me mad attention/ Like I’m under inspection/ I always get the 10s/ ‘Cause I’m built like that.” Neither am I. So watch the “Love Me” clip embedded below, and then say something positive about it down in the comments. I’ll get us started: Kid’s got great taste in source material! Who doesn’t love the Cardigans’ “Lovefool“? Also, toilet-paper antics = age-appropriate fun. Bravo!
* For the purposes of this blog item, anyone over the age of 21.
**Unless you happen to be Entertainment Weekly obsessive*** Bill Gates.
***I totally made that up, but it’s also entirely possible.
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