If Steven Tyler’s interview with the Kidd Kraddick radio show this morning was the equivalent of a first-round audition for the American Idol season 10 judges’ table, I’m not sure he’d have gotten a golden ticket to Hollywood. In fact, given the rambling, ineloquent answers he gave to questions about his rumored Idol gig, it wasn’t hard to envision him as one of those deluded hopefuls who wind up getting dragged from the audition room by security to the general amusement of Simon Cowell & Co.
In other words, if you were at all bummed by Fox chairman Peter Rice’s Press Tour announcement yesterday that there are no finalized deals in place for new judges for Idol’s upcoming season, now would be the time to take a deep breath, look skyward, and thank the heavens that any ink on Tyler’s rumored contract is damp enough to get washed away.
At least that’s what I’m doing right this second. Here’s just hoping Ken Warwick and Cecile Frot-Coutaz are doing the same. Asked about how he’d approach judging wannabe singers, whether he’d be more like brutally honest Simon or sweetly sugarcoated Paula, Tyler responded: “I would be honest to the ones that think they have it, and I would be truthful and sensitive to those that have it but don’t have it yet enough, and I would tell ‘em exactly why, as i see it, if I was to do that.”
Um, dude sounds like a lady…named Paula Abdul!
Tyler was equally bizarre when he was asked to explain how the possibility of a spot in the Simon Cowell Memorial Chair came to be:
“Well, you know, this beautiful girl from Fox came up to me and made an offer. I honored her offer.” [“All night long?” Kraddick interjected.] “I was off ‘er and on ‘er all night. No, um, y’know, and it’s just a work in progress. It’s one of those things. They mentioned it. And I listened. And we’re on tour, so I’ve gotta give it some time,” Tyler added.
Things got even worse when Kraddick’s comely cohort, Jenna Owens, performed an atonal rendition of “I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing.” After declaring the original working track was called “I Don’t Wanna Kiss Your Thing,” Tyler told Jenna that the performance “shows you’re vulnerable and I could have you later,” before making a borderline unintelligible joke to a male member of Kraddick’s team about “sharing her” later. I know a.m. radio is a different forum than Fox in the family hour, but is anyone else skeeved out by the idea of a 60-something rocker making lecherous remarks toward the next incarnation of Jordin Sparks or Katie Stevens? Oh, and shall we launch into Tyler’s discussion of how the world’s first recorded song was the sound of a woman’s orgasm? No, we shall not.
Okay, Idoloonies, who’s ready to start petitions on behalf of Elton John, Harry Connick Jr., Jody Watley, or Linda Perry? Heck, how about Kara DioGuardi? Or Lulu even? Or are you in the camp that thinks Tyler would be an amazing Idol judge? If so, listen to the Kraddick interview embedded below, then make your case in the comments! [Follow Slezak on Twitter @EWMichaelSlezak.]