Annie Barrett
August 09, 2010 AT 10:46 PM EDT

Oh no! According to E! Online, terrible ballroom dancer and reality TV desperadina Kate Gosselin will display her “not-so-serious side” at the very beginning of August 29’s primetime Emmys telecast alongside host Jimmy Fallon. It will be just like this photo, except presumably Kate and Jimmy will not be attempting to convey the harsh realities of fame via the power of the paso doble. This does not bode well.

Does anyone remember the last time Kate Gosselin tried to display her not-so-serious side during network primetime? It was the during the season 10 finale of Dancing With the Stars. You did not watch it, so I will just tell you what happened: It was a dark and stormy night. After a bunch of nobodies like Shannen Doherty performed their exhibitions, Glamorous Star and Record Ratings-Monger Kate appeared! First she re-danced her cringe-inducing ”Paparazzi” paso doble. Then suddenly more of her legs were showing and without any warning whatsoever — SCENE CHANGE — she was grinning ”serenely” atop a forklift as a low-powered smoke machine sputtered below. The audience’s reaction was nil; nobody had a clue what was going on. Tom Bergeron had to diffuse the intense awkwardness of the post-dance atmosphere by joking that she’d be up there for the next two hours, and you could tell the audience members who’d woken up by that point were like “Oh, wow, that’d be great!” PopWatch reader LR summed it up better and more depressingly than I ever could: ”Watching Kate Gosselin dance to ‘I Will Survive’ was one of the worst moments of my life. And I’ve had a horrible life.” That’s the spirit! What a season!

If nobody in the live audience of a ballroom dancing reality show of which she was a legitimate cast member could be bothered to care about Kate’s tragic attempt at levity, I can’t even imagine how the audience (let alone viewers at home) will react during the freaking EMMYS.

Annie on Twitter: @EWAnnieBarrett

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