Jeff Probst blogs 'Survivor: Nicaragua': Episode 3 | EW.com

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Jeff Probst blogs 'Survivor: Nicaragua': Episode 3

survivorImage Credit: Monty Brinton/CBS“Sorry bout smushing the bananas.”
Naonka, Survivor: Nicaragua 2010

Okay I need to preface this blog by saying that I’m very frustrated at the moment and therefore may very well write things that I later regret. Which really means that I’ve already considered if I’ll regret the comments and have decided I don’t care if I do regret them, which means I really don’t/won’t regret them at all. I know what I’m writing it and my intention is clear.

The two big reasons for my frustration:

1. Naonka
2. Marty

Naonka wins out because my frustration with Naonka touches on humanity. I was so disturbed by what I saw and heard in this episode that I could barely write this blog.

My frustration with Marty is much less emotional. It’s based on his out of control arrogance and ego and is probably just me talking to myself. That’s usually how it goes, right? It’s not ever about the “other person”… it’s always about you. That’s what my shrink says anyway. Yes, I’ve already emailed her for an appointment.

JIMMY JOHNSON
Before we get to my frustration, let me share my sadness that Jimmy Johnson is gone.

I’m probably just star struck but I really enjoyed having him around. I think he had a big target on his back from day one. He’s just too popular, too successful and too financially well off to really have a shot at winning this game. But he was a true Survivor fan. He applied three times to be on the show and I am so happy he hung in there and ended up on the show. It was a real treat for all of us and I’m guessing a real treat for a lot of fans as well.

I stand by my earlier statements that in voting him out the older tribe voted out a proven leader and the truth is they don’t have anybody to take his place. It damn sure ain’t you, Marty. I know you are very successful in your normal life, but on Survivor, the only thing you’re capable of leading are the lambs to the slaughter. Your tribemates are the lambs and the game is the slaughter.

Marty doesn’t understand Survivor 1/10th as well as he thinks he does. Never has. I’m not saying Marty can’t or won’t make it to the end, lots of people make it to the end, never fully understanding the game they are playing. But the only way Marty wins is if he takes a jury full of his older tribemates with him and at the rate they are losing challenges, that seems unlikely. (I warned you I was in a mood.)

Here’s the latest proof that Marty is being driven solely by ego and not the amazing game play as he keeps professing:

Marty: (To Dan) “Can you imagine what your friends in Manhattan are gonna say when you say you blindsided Jimmy Johnson.”

Yeah, I think they’re gonna say you missed the forest for the trees. You were conspiring about who to vote out with the one guy you should have voted out! Dan is still in this game. Now that’s amazing game play.

HAS ANYBODY SEEN JILL?
Jill is also disappointing me. Maybe it’s just a theme today: Disappointment. Could it be that I am just disappointed in myself? Maybe. I’m having a good hair day, so it can’t be that. I just had a big breakfast, so it’s not low blood sugar. Who knows.

Anyway, Jill is disappointing me because Jill should be doing much better. Jill understands the game as well or better than anybody on her tribe but she is too weak to take over.

First she gave the idol to Marty and now she’s giving her vote to Marty. She says “whatever” but I don’t buy it. I don’t know what is going on but she’s much tougher and stronger than she is showing.

I had such high hopes for her being a leader. She should have the idol in her pocket, nobody should know about it and she and Jimmy Johnson should be leading this tribe. Did you see how much fun they were having when they were all fishing together? Jill what are you doing?

Instead you have Marty, Jiimmy T and Tyrone doing the leading. If this is your fantasy Survivor line up, you’re screwed.

Marty, Jimmy T, Tyrone, if you’re mad at me, go back and read the opening paragraph – it’s all about me. This has nothing to do with you. Nadathing.

By the way, Marty, the other people are playing the game. Just because they’re not playing the way you want them to doesn’t mean they’re not playing.

I will give Marty credit for sharing the idol. Normally I’d consider this a monumental mistake, but given the vibe on this tribe, I think he was smart. It makes him look like a bit of a decent guy and nobody on this tribe (except maybe Jane) is smart enough to figure out how to make it work for them…or against Marty anyway. He’s safe for the moment.

SIDE NOTE: HOWLER MONKEYS
The Howler monkeys are everywhere in Nicaragua. They make a very loud “howl,” they sit up in the trees and throw sticks at you.

Jimmy Johnson wasn’t the only one howling back at the monkeys.

After challenges the crew would drive back through the jungle, along a long, winding, bumpy road and you could often hear the monkeys screaming. We’d often pull over just to listen and watch. Sure enough you find yourself trying to speak to them by howling back. Sometimes they responded and you felt like Jane Goodall.

FABIO
Yes I know I keep calling him Jud. Sorry. I’m not living with him 24/7. I didn’t realize how strongly the nickname had attached to him. If he lasts longer I’ll figure it out. But, how can you not dig Fabio…at least a little bit. I love that he wants to be kept around for more than “just being funny.” It’s like the hot girl who says “there is more to me than just my looks.” There probably is, but nobody cares!

Fabio, keep being funny and stop over thinking it. Funny can get you a long way in life, just like being hot. Look at Sarah Silverman… hot and funny = major success.

DAN
“I’m as strong as any of the women.” Uh, no you’re not. I don’t think Dan could beat anybody, including the unnamed “moose” he referenced. Dan, you’re a really charming guy who I like quite a bit but I am amazed you passed our physical. But you did and there you are still in the game and two other people from your tribe are gone. Okay, Wendy was justified. Ah heck, maybe Jimmy J was too.

NAONKA
Okay let’s get to it – the thing that is really bothering me today. It’s you, Naonka. I am so torn over what I saw in last night’s episode.

You KNOCKED DOWN A WOMAN WITH AN ARTIFICIAL LEG! ON PURPOSE! SPECIFICALLY BECAUSE YOU KNEW THAT WOULD THROW HER OFF BALANCE SO YOU COULD STEAL A CLUE THAT SHE FOUND FIRST!

Whew. That felt good. I feel better already.

Here’s my dilemma. Naonka’s argument is simple: “It’s a game. I should use anything to my advantage and I did. Tough beans that Kelly B has an artificial leg. Not my problem.” I can’t argue against that. She’s right. Technically.

But man, my gut turned when I saw the scene. Keep in mind I do not watch tape on location so I had no idea this had gone down and how physical it got between Naonka and Kelly B.

Had I known, I’m not sure if I could have contained myself the next time I saw Naonka. Okay that’s a lie. Of course I could have contained myself, but I certainly would have looked at Naonka a bit differently.

And then to offer an apology to the tribe for “smushing the bananas…” That was the line that hung in the air for me. She made a conscious decision to apologize for the bananas but no mention of Kelly B. (And for the record, those bananas are the equivalent of gold bars on Survivor. She ruined a big chunk of the reward they just won.)

Naonka: “I got hood. Not ghetto.” I don’t even know what that line means, but the inference is that she knows what she did was rough and that makes it even worse.

For me it just comes down to fairness in life. Yes, you can argue that Survivor is a game and anything goes and if you say that I will nod and agree with you. This is just my own point of view. For me, there is a “fairness in life” philosophy that would prohibit me from taking that kind of advantage from someone like Kelly B. I know Kelly can take care of herself but an artificial leg is not a real leg. It does not and cannot do every single thing a real leg can and when it comes to balance Kelly B is at a disadvantage.

I really found it distasteful.

I will offer this, Naonka you should be writing for a television show. You would have to write alone, because nobody would last with you in the same room, but you spit out some of the most honest and compelling comments I’ve ever heard a person say. They’re not always pleasant but they are revealing of your character and that makes them on some level worth exploring.

Make no mistake, you are a villain. I don’t think anybody watching this season would disagree. Doesn’t mean you can’t get to the end, but I would bet my house and everything in my bank account you can’t win. Then again, I thought Sash would be first off. So what do I really know.

This is Survivor folks. Bringing together a cross-section of America. Forcing them to live together, while battling against each other. It can be a nasty game.

See ya Jimmy J. Hope to catch a game with you one day.

Check out the exclusive deleted scene below, and be sure to read Dalton Ross’ full episode recap.

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