Tanner Stransky
November 12, 2010 AT 03:15 PM EST

Curtis Baker/The CW

Burlesque star Cher showed up on the Late Show with David Letterman last night to promote her big razzle-dazzle movie, but she ended up talking quite a bit about other things. Mostly, how she deals with fame; a hilarious gay Bar Mitzvah wedding that she went to; and her never-ending Las Vegas show. As you might imagine, Cher paired with Letterman is rather hilarious. Here, the highlights from her appearance, in sound bite form, and the video clip is embedded below.

On being recognized: “The only time it’s rough is like — well, the paparazzi are nightmares, so they’re never nice. They’re always just crap.”

On gay weddings being her “busman’s holiday”: “I went to a Bar Mitzvah. No, it wasn’t a Bar Mitzvah! It was a wedding. Two guys. Right. It wasn’t a Bar Mitzvah. Right. It was a gay, Jewish wedding! For me, it was like a busman’s holiday, okay?”

On being mistaken for a Cher impersonator: “I went in the bathroom and I’m coming out, and a woman goes, ‘Miss, miss! Could I have your card? Because you are the best I’ve ever seen!’ And I’m so dense, I’m thinking, ‘I don’t have a card. I don’t carry cards.'”

On the audience at her Las Vegas show: “It’s been very different because the people are pretty old. And, uh, I always think, in the beginning I thought, Oh, what a pain in the ass. But then I thought: This might be the last concert they ever see.”

On her age, compared to the audience at her Las Vegas show: “The people come in oxygen sometimes…. It taught me a lot. You know, it taught me a lot because in the beginning, I was very, like, you know, I don’t wanna do this. I’m young! Then I’m thinking, I’m probably older than most of these people taking oxygen.”

On why she likes playing arenas better than Las Vegas: “I like playing arenas because the people who come there really know my material and they’re very, you know… I have this one thing, which I’m sure is true, where the guy says to his wife or girlfriend, ‘I’m going to take you to see the naked old bitch, and then I’m gambling.’ And I’m sure that that’s true!”

On Warren Beatty: “Yeah.”

On Tom Cruise: “Yeah.”

On Elvis: “Almost.”

Always a minx, that Cher! Gotta love her for it.

Tanner on Twitter: @EWTanStransky

More on Cher from EW.com:

Cher exclusive: The superstar discusses her upcoming album

Chef baffled by her exclusion from the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame: Is she delusional, or does she have a point?

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