By now, we’re all pretty used to Gwyneth Paltrow’s knack for inspiring both envy and eye rolls with her lifestyle newsletter GOOP (which might as well be subtitled “Dispatches from a life better than yours.”). But the Oscar-winning actress and sometimes singer has officially one-upped herself in her new cookbook, My Father’s Daughter (in stores now), which contains — alongside some truly great-looking recipes — a dedication page that may just be the most A-list in the history of publishing. Ever the polite hostess, Paltrow doesn’t up and out her pals; she only references them by last name. And a rep for Paltrow declined to identify any of the parties mentioned in the book. But with our extensive knowledge of all things Gwyneth, we’ve come up with a pretty starry list of suspects — Beyoncé? Robert Downey Jr.? Christy Turlington? — for the people Paltrow calls her “closest friends, our family really.” Check out the full dedication and our educated guesses after the jump!
“[T]his book is dedicated to my brother, Jake, my first guinea pig, who makes meals great just by being there, and for looking so much like [Paltrow’s late father] Bruce while he is eating them. Also to our closest friends, our family really, who are always the reason to have a dinner party, the Wigmore-Reynolds, the Van Nices, the Carters, the Turly-Burnses and their extended clan, the Maudes, the Harveys, the Downeys, the McCartney-Willises, the Spielbergs, the Nadal-Saxe-Coburgs, the Conrad-Manions, the Hill-McGraws… for Apple and Moses, hearts of my artichoke, my raisins d’être.”
First off, there are the gimmes: Steven Spielberg (whom Paltrow reportedly calls “Uncle Morty” just to rub it in); Gwyneth’s brother, director Jake Paltrow; her dad, the late producer Bruce Paltrow; her two kids with Chris Martin (who is weirdly absent from the whole book). But all the cryptic couples are where it really gets fun:
The Carters: Gwyneth is a close friend of Beyoncé and Jay-Z, né Shawn Carter. She even referred to Jay-Z as “Mr. Carter” in a recent GOOP newsletter. We’ve always wondered: Does Sasha Fierce require a separate table setting?
The Turly-Burnses: Supermodel Christy Turlington and her husband, actor/filmmaker Ed Burns.
The Downeys: As in Iron Man co-star Robert, Jr., we assume?
The McCartney Willises: Gwyneth splits her time between NYC and London, where’s she’s been spotted hanging out with designer Stella McCartney and husband Alasdhair Willis.
The Nadal-Saxe-Coburgs: Paltrow’s pals aren’t limited to showbiz royalty. Her buddy Rosario Saxe-Coburg (née Nadal), is married to — though currently separated from — real-life royal Prince Kyril of Bulgaria.
The Wigmore-Reynolds: That would be Mary Wigmore Reynolds, a Paltrow pal (and GOOP contributor).
The Van Nices: Julia Cuddihy Van Nice is an old school chum who’s also the publicist for trainer Tracy Anderson, who works with Gwyneth and Madonna.
The Hill-McGraws: As in Faith and Tim, Paltrow’s Country Strong co-star. Could be a good occasion for Gwyneth to whip up a batch of her deliciously southern-sounding corn fritters (on page 210).
That leaves the mysterious Maudes, Harveys, and Conrad-Manions. Any guesses? Could Maude be Madonna? Are the Harveys code for Weinsteins? Or Coldplay member Phil Harvey? And seriously, where is Chris Martin in all of this? Leave your guesses after the jump!