'Cougar Town': Adventures in babysitting | EW.com

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'Cougar Town': Adventures in babysitting

Cougar Town 4 20

(MICHAEL ANSELL/ABC)

It’s like Christmas (or whatever holiday you celebrate) in April with TWO new episodes of Cul-De-Sac Crew…umm Cougar City…I mean Cougar Town this week. So let’s pound grape and dive right into it!

In Wednesday’s “Baby’s A Rock ‘N’ Roller,” we were reminded of baby Stan. That’s right. Ellie and Andy have a kid. Really, they do! I’m not making it up. And thus a plot was born: In order to prove that it’s a lot harder to raise a baby in your 40s than in your 20s, Ellie gets Jules (and Grayson by association) to babysit Stan. Team Ellie pointed out when Jules had Travis, she was young, had a lot of energy, and was too dumb to worry about screwing him up. Team Jules seemed to think that with a devoted husband and nanny, Ellie had it easy peasy. So Jules put all of her dangerous items in the pantry and her babysitting duties began.

We all knew where this was going. After just a few hours with Stan, Jules was hiding in the pantry with a pacifier and Big Carl. Then, true exhaustion set in. Grayson and Jules locked Stan into an inescapable fort/baby prison/Alcatraz. But Houdini got out! Kids are smart like that. Stan went straight to the pantry of danger/safe room and locked himself inside. Call 911! We may have an emergency.

False alarm! Stan didn’t consume anything on his allergy of death list, and Grasyon didn’t have to stab a baby (with an EpiPen). Ellie came to the rescue with the trick of motherhood: Bait your child with a goldfish cracker. That noise you hear is her eating a big bite of “I was right” steak.

Meanwhile, Laurie was still off her game after her breakup with Smith. Since their split, she hadn’t had a single walk of shame (a.k.a. walk of awesome). The crew convinced her it was time to get back out there. She needed to hit it and quit it, toot it and boot it, whip it and skip it, wax it and tax it, mother it and smother it, bop it and drop it, and chuck it and re-chuck it! So with Andy as her wingman and the ground rules established – promote ass worship because it’s contagious – she went out to find Mr. Right for tonight. Unfortunately, she realized she might be growing up. The sticky floors, shiny shirts, and weird rich Russian dudes who say “you want to make dance with me” just weren’t cutting it anymore. Yes, it might have reduced the odds of her being randomly murdered by like half. But where’s the fun in that? But in the end, Laurie got her walk of awesome (complete with judgmental looks) after a night with a cute coffee shop guy. It was a total Mary Tyler Mooreyou’re gonna make it after all” moment. But instead of throwing her hat in the air, she threw her one remaining shoe.

And no surprise here, but Penny Can founder Bobby Cobb and mornings just do not get along. While training for the PGA tournament, he could play golf for free as long as he made it on the course before 6 a.m. Which was no easy task for a man who needed an alarm and dog Travis to wake him up in the morning. (In his defense, we all know how hard it is to pull yourself out of a good dog spoon.) His failure to wake up “shows how I blow all my chances for a better life” just like Gary Busey. So human Travis vowed to help Bobby make it to the course on time. And they made it! Well, they fell asleep while driving the golf cart, but baby steps.

Speaking of baby steps, at the end of the episode Grayson dropped this bomb: “I can’t wait to have a kid!” Eeek! Jules had just told Ellie she was glad to be done with her child rearing years. I’m guessing she’ll pound a lot of grape before she has to have that conversation with Grayson.

Other “Baby’s a Rock ‘N’ Roller” highlights:

++ Jules’ waking up questions: Why do you eat some many carbs? What’s an aardvark? Do you think we’ll ever live in London? Where are you going? Should I learn to play golf? Do we do enough together? We don’t we ever use my Jacuzzi? Are you tired of Florida? Should we live in London? What is a flat?

++ Trav’s sleepwalking frisky business

++ “It’s so on. If Ellie says it’s on…It may not be on.” –Andy of his wingman duties

++ A reference to Laurie’s friend, Nezzie. (Don’t worry. The county paid for her to have metal legs after she was trampled.)

++ “I’m great with kids. My son almost made honor roll. Twice. I’m a bit of a Mary Poppins.” –Jules

++ Ellie knowing something was wrong because Jules would never make a roast

++ Grayson and baby Stan’s matching pajamas

What did you think of last night’s episode? Do you wake up happy, swinging, and/or asking questions? I hope I’ve caught you during the seven minutes of the day that you are in a good mood. Time to pour yourself a big bowl of “we can do this” and comment!

Follow me on Twitter: @breiabrissey

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