Aly Semigran
July 05, 2011 AT 05:33 PM EDT

If you’ve ever thought to yourself, “Boy, that Justin Bieber is really something! He can sing, he can dance, he can dazzle us with his ability to do things in the third dimension! Is there anything that tiny, talented Canuck can’t do?!” Well, we hate to burst your Bieber bubble, but it turns out there is something the 17-year fails at: Selling magazines. (And, no we don’t mean like when elementary school kids wrangle you into subscriptions for fundraisers. Although you probably should get EW. You know, for the children.)

According to, the February issue of Vanity Fair that featured a kiss-stained Bieber on their cover is on pace to becoming their worst-selling one in 12 years. The VF disappointment (his cover story, which asked/threatened readers with the question “Is this the adorable, inescapable face of 2011?,” reportedly moved just 246,000 copies) isn’t the only one for the windswept wonder, as it’s also noted that issues of Teen Vogue and People that prominently featured the “Baby” singer didn’t do so hot, either.

We have some theories as to why the Justin Bieber Vanity Fair issue didn’t bode well:

— Young, female readers assumed the kiss marks were from his smooching ladyfriend Selena Gomez or his former May-December fling Kim Kardashian and were too busy crafting strongly worded letters to them instead of buying a copy.

— Everyone was grounded the week it hit newsstands. No allowance = no Biebs.

— ‘Tweens are just sick and tired of reading about Warren Buffet! (to be fair, it was sorta weird he was in the Teen Vogue issue, too.)

— Reliable VF buyers opted to pick up Life & Style instead to avoid public embarrassment.

— It’s almost as creepy as this.

Why do you think the Justin Bieber issue of Vanity Fair tanked, PopWatchers?

Read more:

Justin Bieber’s Google Chrome commercial

Justin Bieber gets tackled during fragrance unveiling in New York

Lady Gaga, Justin Bieber are the best-paid stars under 30. Think of all the Ramen they could buy!

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