Even though Courtney Stodden should be the one getting presents for this, her 17th birthday, the actress/model/fodder for The Soup got us all something instead: The gift of perpetually creeping us out! Yes, actor Doug Hutchsinon’s teen bride turned one year older today. And as she proved from her Twitter page is all the wiser: “Celebrating the last night of being sweet-n-sexy 16 by wearing NOTHING but my tasty bday-suit! Mmm; Yummy! ; -)” (If your reaction to reading that sounded something like this, you are correct.)
If that weren’t enough to prompt you to make bizarre, uncomfortable faces, read what Stodden’s mother Krista, who has been supportive of her daughter’s relationship to the Lost star who is now only 34 years her senior, told E! News about her little girl’s birthday plans. “Courtney and Doug were planning on going to Disneyland,” she said, adding, “It’s funny they call her the child bride, but she does love going to Disneyland.” Sure, let’s go with “funny” as the word you were looking for.
Ma Stodden continued that the couple will instead go shopping (who doesn’t love a trip to Build-A-Bear?!), swimming in a lake and having dinner together. She also explained that her daughter received lingerie from her husband, but since I already fear that you’ve jumped out of your office window, or at the very least are contemplating it, I’ll spare you. After all, we like, Courtney, have so much to look forward to, like…being old enough to vote or rent a car. Ah, youth!