Annie Barrett
December 14, 2011 AT 11:44 AM EST

Behold the new trailer for Adam Shankman’s Rock of Ages musical, starring Catherine Zeta-Jones, Russell Brand, Paul Giamatti, Tom Cruise, Mary J. Blige, Julianne Hough, and a nostalgia-inducing “Dirk Diggler’s name in lights” font. (Actually mis-typed “Julianne Moore” up there. Damnit!) It may cause seizures, but you’ll want to press play if only to see the TERRIBLE wig on TV’s Jack Donaghy as Alec Baldwin Month continues. Watch it here:

The Bourbon Room’s whole existence is riding on Tom Cruise’s rock-icon character Stacee Jaxx. Judging from the way he listlessly signs a groupie’s clavicle, there may be a twist: He’s blind! Also, Bryan Cranston is supposed to be in this and I can’t find him so maybe I’m blind.

Does the Rock of Ages movie look so cheesy that it will be awesome, or does it just look cheesy?

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Read more:

Tom Cruise in ‘Rock of Ages’ — FIRST PHOTO

Alec Baldwin won’t leave ‘Rock of Ages’

Bryan Cranston joins ‘Rock of Ages’ cast

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