EW Staff
February 10, 2012 AT 12:00 PM EST

”Ugh! Damp towel! Damp! It’s like a really big Wet-Nap. I feel like I’m being licked by a golden retriever.”

—Schmidt (Max Greenfield), after getting out of the shower, on New Girl

”I have several men in rotation. One’s waiting for me out in the car. Don’t worry, I rolled down the window.”

—Donna (Retta) on Parks and Recreation

”Everyone knows you here. You’re famous here. You’re the Meryl Streep of maternal-fetal medicine.”

—Jake (Benjamin Bratt) to Addison (Kate Walsh), when she tells him no one will notice her getting drunk at a bar during a medical conference, on Private Practice

”Any girl would wanna dance with you. You’re rich. And you’re fat, so you’ll die young. Women love that.”

—Jenna (Jane Krakowski), attempting to cheer up a boy at his bar mitzvah, on 30 Rock

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