Dan Snierson
October 23, 2012 AT 06:13 PM EDT

Tonight’s season 3 premiere of Happy Endings doesn’t begin with a bang or a whimper, but there is plenty of clattering and yelping when a special date between Penny (Casey Wilson) and boyfriend Chris (guest-star Brian Austin Green) goes awry. You will also bear witness to the rather curious ways that Brad (Damon Wayans Jr.) has been occupying himself since losing his job — and the one that involves his old ventriloquist dummy named Sinbrad may be only the second strangest. Oh, and Dave (Zachary Knighton) and Alex (Elisha Cuthbert) have a very serious announcement: They’re casually dating.

All of this action from the zippy-zany ABC comedy goes down in the first five minutes of the episode, which you can wait patiently to see at 9 p.m. Or you can be all like, “Suck it, patience!” and click on the video below to watching those first five minutes right now. Check out the rest of the episode at its proper time tonight to see Max (Adam Pally) do his Misery-able Kathy Bates impression on an ailing Penny.

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