Hillary Busis
November 10, 2012 AT 05:30 AM EST

Oh, how cruel the Degrassi gods are this week. They’ve set up all this glorious drama — Alli’s about to pull a Jessie Spano! Tristan’s about to pull an Emma from season 5! — that we won’t see fully play out until next week’s episode. This is the Degrassi I love — fast-paced, juicy, and not focused on a girl who can’t recognize diabetes when it’s literally staring her in the face.

A plot: Alli is busting her butt to graduate early so she can make it to MIT next year, and her “all work no play” policy is really starting to take a toll. She gets all excited about maybe, possibly getting back together with Dave — only to have him dump her again because he doesn’t like to be kept waiting. (Anyone else think Dave’s being way too harsh, especially when he sticks her with the bill at The Dot? Alli is beautiful and brilliant. Can’t he just accept that he won’t always be her top priority?) Luckily, bad boy Dallas is there to soothe Alli’s wounded heart… and to get her some amphetamines so that she can stay awake long enough to finish all her work. This certainly will not end well. I can’t wait.

B plot: Aspiring actor Tristan wants to play the lead in the zombie movie Eli just decided to make. But Eli isn’t sure that Tris is up for the challenge of such a physically demanding role. After Eli’s comments and a particularly disastrous yoga class with his crush, Tris is on a one-way train to Eating Disorder Village. Degrassi manages to dust off this old plot point in a quasi-new way by having Tris go on a cleanse — maybe he’ll be the franchise’s first orthorexic? Either way, I hope that actor Lyle O’Donohoe didn’t develop any insecurities as a result of this storyline. You’re cute as a button, Tris/Lyle! Fab — love the name — would be lucky to have a guy like you.

C plot: Some fairly innocuous stuff about Imogen’s mother, Natalie, not approving of the fact that Fiona lives apart from her parents. This subplot is mainly notable for how Imogen responds when an anxious Fiona asks if their dinner with Natalie went okay: “We ate food. No one barfed.” Sometimes, it’s about the little things.

Coming up next week: A pair (or trio?) of amazing meltdowns, as well as what Degrassi is calling a “rap-pology.” The waiting is the hardest part.

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