Don’t let those eggheads at NASA try to fool you: The world will end on 12/21/12, just as the Mayans predicted centuries ago. (An actual excerpt from their prophetic tablet: “That’s great, it starts with an earthquake, birds and snakes, an aeroplane – Lenny Bruce is not afraid.” Such an advanced culture!)
How do I know the end is near? Because the signs of an imminent apocalypse have been coming all year – signs like these:
2. Once-fun K-Pop phenomenon “Gangnam Style” refuses to go away, spurring tiresome parodies/homages made by everyone from the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles to Glee. Even Jay Leno’s doing the dance. When does it end, people?! (Oh, yeah: tomorrow.)
3. And similarly: lame election memes take all the fun out of what was already a pretty un-fun presidential race.
4. John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John’s incredible, awful music video for “I Think You Might Like It.”
6. There are currently six Real Housewives shows airing on Bravo on rotation. Come January – if we make it that far – Tina Fey won’t have even one show.
8. Speaking of: The CW orders a Hunger Games-inspired reality show, thereby proving that they really, really didn’t get the point of The Hunger Games.
9. Perhaps even worse: Honey Boo Boo’s televised home orders a reality show called Best Funeral Ever. The network’s initials stand for THE LEARNING CHANNEL.
11. Couple names their baby Hashtag.
12. Baby Beluga is dead.
13. Donald Trump.
That’s it; I’m good and ready for the apocalypse. Got any pop culture travesties to add to this list?