Sam Urdank/Fox; Disney
Annie Barrett
May 23, 2013 AT 07:31 PM EDT

So I went a little nuts with Vine!

Boozy-witchy Bluth matriarch Lucille has generously taken time out of her day-drinking to snap some sense into the damsels of Disney. They could all stand to lose some weight, by the way. You want your belt to buckle, not your chair. (Click the microphones on and off to hear the audio.)

Snow White

[Vine]

Cinderella

[Vine]

Sleeping Beauty‘s Aurora:

[Vine]

The Little Mermaid‘s Ariel

[Vine]

Beauty and the Beast‘s Belle

[Vine]

Aladdin‘s Jasmine

[Vine]

COMING UP NEXT: Pocahontas, Mulan, Tiana, Rapunzel, Merida… and Simba

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