Patti Stanger has love in her blood.
The star of Bravo’s The Millionaire Matchmaker, currently in its seventh season, believes matchmaking is in her DNA. Makes sense, since both her mother and grandmother were matchmakers before her. But Patti has made the art of finding the perfect match her own. Her blunt words and actions (she’s not afraid to slap a guy on TV) have made Stanger the go-to girl for advice on love. Stanger shared some of her relationship tips with EW, setting up the Real Housewives and their friends in the future, and why now is the easiest time to find love.
Don’t Be Afraid of Online Dating
“Pre-online dating, there was nowhere to go.” Patti should know: She met her current boyfriend David on the website Plenty of Fish and vouches for other sites like Match.com. Long gone are the days of just going to a bar and hoping to meet someone. “It’s totally hard to find love,” she said. “Much easier to find a job. You don’t know where to look! You know where to look for a job.” But what happens when your job and love combine? “If you work in a corporate company it could be tough, especially if you’re sleeping with your boss!” But overall Stanger is OK with dating in the workplace. That must be why two of her assistants are now dating, and of course her former assistants Rachel and Destin, who met on the job, are now married.
How to Know If Your Friends Are a Match
Everyone loves to play matchmaker with their mutual friends, but how do you really know if they would be a good pair? “First, you got to see if they have chemistry,” Stanger says. “They have to be each other’s types. That’s why I ask about celebrity crushes.” Patti also says you have to compare their hopes, wishes, and moral values and see if they’re both into family, travel, etc. “They have to have some sort of commonality to make it last.” As for religion, Patti says you have to respect each person’s individual beliefs. “If you’re a Jew and won’t let a Christmas tree into the house, that’s a red flag!”
A Question of Age and Money
All of Patti’s clients are wealthy, obviously, so how does that affect finding love? Not as much as you’d think. “Everyone’s a bitch in love. They take no prisoners and they expect the best no matter what they pay.” However, though they may have a lot of money, most of the millionaires Patti sets up seem to have no patience. “They want their match yesterday!” As for the question of age and dating, Patti says you shouldn’t go more than 10 years older or younger than you or “you’re going to end up like Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher and break up ‘cause then you’re into different pop cultures, different music, different movies. You’re not going to resonate with them.” But does age matter when it comes to starting a relationship? “If you want a relationship, age doesn’t matter. A relationship means being monogamous with one other person. If you want to date, date. There is no absolute for everybody.”
‘Nobody in the World Could Do What We Do’
With The Millionaire Matchmaker, what you see on TV is actually what happens. The show is filmed in real time over a three-day period for each millionaire. Patti meets them on a Monday, recruits matches on Tuesday, and throws a mixer on Wednesday. The rest is up to the millionaire. “You only got 24 hours to find these girls and you got to make sure they show up, and we shoot in the middle of the day. So you could be working that day.” Stanger and her staff counsel the clients on their dates, but the millionaires make the final decision, with or without Patti’s approval. Her favorite past date? A romantic hot air balloon ride to a winery with a string quartet. Stanger jokes she would want to clone herself so she can match more people in more cities across the world and that gays and lesbians are her favorite clients to set up – even if their behavior isn’t always the most appropriate. “They want all of them! Their eyes go all over the place and they all want each other. We’ve caught people having sex in the bathrooms at previous mixers, getting it on! Pass out the numbers after the millionaire has picked! I’m putting a bunch of hot guys in one place, what do you think they’re going to do?”
Housewives in Love
Later this season, Patti will set up Tiger Wood’s ex Rachel Uchitel, who has “made some weird decisions in love.” And the season finale features two bridesmaids from NeNe Leake’s wedding. Fans of the show are still waiting for a big confrontation with one of her clients this year, and they won’t be disappointed. “Everyone’s waiting for me to really scream into a millionaire and give him my worst. Well, you haven’t met Vegas Dave. Vegas Dave does something that no millionaire in history has ever done.” In addition to NeNe, Patti is a friend to many other Real Housewives stars who could use a good match, including Beverly Hills’ Brandi Glanville and Miami’s Marysol Patton. If Bravo approves, Patti says she wouldn’t hesitate to do a full show with just Housewives. “That would be really interesting. Let them fight over the men! Wouldn’t that be cool? That’s a show, right?” Yup – but we think it’s already called The Real Housewives…
Here is some more of Patti’s advice on how to find love:
• “Stop listening to your parents, stop listening to your friends. They don’t know what your soul wants. Only you do.”
• “Those who travel in packs do not attract. Get out of the house alone.”
• “Women complain more. We have more estrogen and we are emotional. They’re not the easiest clients.”
• “If you’re working in an industry where there isn’t a lot of women and you want to meet a girl, you got to get online!”
The Millionaire Matchmaker airs Thursdays at 9 p.m. ET on Bravo.