After Guardians of the Galaxy all but won the summer—and Dancing Baby Groot won Guardians of the Galaxy—it was only a matter of time before someone created a Dancing Baby Groot toy. After all, there’s a high probability that the demand for a Dancing Baby Groot will be to holiday season 2014 what the demand for a Furby was to holiday season 1998.
It’s not terribly far-fetched, actually, to imagine that the adults who got a Furby in 1998 are probably the same people now getting Dancing Baby Groots. That is, until they see the lackluster toy.
In the Guardians of the Galaxy credits scene from which Dancing Baby Groot originated, it wasn’t the fact that Baby Groot was dancing that made it funny. Rather, it was Baby Groot’s moves—a.k.a. the real-life moves of director James Gunn—paired with the expression of pure unadulterated joy on Groot’s face. Plus, the little dude had rhythm.
But when Mashable released a video preview of the toy’s moves, there was a severe lack of spastic-yet-rhythmic arm movements, not to mention the fact that the toy is all about the smooth motion of the hips when the movie’s Groot is much more on beat. He doesn’t swirl his hips; he playfully bops them from side to side. In the year 2014, surely there’s technology to give us a more accurate Groot. As for this guy? He might be the toy we need, but he is not the one we deserve.